A 2500 year old mummy that had some amazing tattoos.
WHAT.
NO FUCKING WAY.
YO HOLD ON.
IT GETS BETTER.
This mummy, found in the Altai mountains of Siberia, is actually that of a young woman who died at about the age of twenty-five; she is thought to have been a member of the Pazyryk tribe.
She was buried with six horses and two similarly-tattooed men (the horned griffon that decorates her shoulder also appears on the man buried closest to her, covering most of his right side), possibly escorts. She was also wearing a horse-hair wig, silk, and elaborate boots, which is all a level of ceremony that would have likely only been accorded to a woman of high rank. You didn’t get inked like this unless you were very important, and had worked your way up to that importance.
…Hence, of course, the references to her by researchers as ‘The Ukok Princess,’ although due to the lack of weapons in her grave they have concluded that the woman was in fact a healer or a storyteller.
And now I’m all consumed with curiosity: Who was she? What amazing things did she accomplish? Why these symbols, and what did they mean? Who were the two men alongside her?
The most informative article about it can be found here, although I would completely eat up any other information you guys could find.
this movie is either going to be an glorious “so bad it’s good” train wreck on par with the Super Mario Bros movie, or a proper heir to the legacy of Who Framed Roger Rabbit
Either way, Bob Hoskins would be proud.
I love how well they poke fun at the Pokémon Move “Reflect” xD
so we have these cookie jars that sit on top of the cupboard right. we’ve had them for years. you can record yourself saying something so when you take the lid off you it will make a noise so you can hear if someone is stealing your cookies or something anyway anyway we have 3 of them. a pig, a cow, and an owl. now i was left alone one day. mum and dad at work, my brother at school and my sister at her boyfriends house. so i had a thought. what if i recorded myself screaming? so i did. in all 3 of them. all 3 different screams too. one was an excited shriek, one was a terrified scream, and one was a long shout. these cookie jars recorded up to 15 seconds, so i took FULL ADVANTAGE of that. now…here’s the thing…i did that almost 3 years ago. and these cookie jars have been sitting on top of the cupboard collecting dust.
until today.
mum’s painting the kitchen, so she had to take everything off the top of the cupboard. and uh…you know how battery powered things…start dying? they……slowly run out of juice? she asked me to check inside one of the jars. the pig, to be exact. and…the pig was the terrified scream. i unsuspectingly opened the jar and as the lid came off the jar, i remembered what i did. but i didn’t remember in time, because in that next second, a fucking demon cry sounded from this Almost Dead Battery Powered Pig Cookie Jar. it was a sound i never want to hear again. everyone ran into the kitchen to see what that god awful sound was and i just stood there, holding this satanic wailing pig. i shut my eyes, and waited the full 15 seconds, until it was silent, before turning to my mum and handed her the pig, and then leaving the kitchen.
i’ll admit i’ve done some dumb things in my life, but nothing could’ve prepared me for the sound i heard today.
every year around christmas me and my grandma play this fun family game called “maybe you want to put jesus in your room instead, sweetie? :)”. now, it’s important to note that the jesus referred to in our game is not actually the real jesus christ, but instead a wooden figure i made in 2011 that has an uncanny resemblance to the lord and savior himself
so what happens is that i place jesus in our living room, and my grandma smiles and asks me if i don’t want to decorate my room with him instead. i ask her in return if she thinks my jesus figure is ugly (which he is), but she reassures me that this is not the case. however, a couple of days later jesus mysteriously disappears from our living room, and appear in my room instead
now, the real jesus christ might have been able to perform a miracle like this, but please remember that the jesus in our story is only a figure made out of wood. he can not move on his own, so i think we can safely say that my grandma is the prime suspect here
the first year i would often confront my grandma about this, but she would always make up an excuse and never straight up tell me she moved him because he’s so ugly it’s an embarrassment to the family
eventually i grew tired of her lies, so now we only move jesus around in silence. one second he’s in the living room, the next he’s back in my room. in a way i think this adds an extra element of excitement to the holiday season, because you never know for sure when jesus is going to be moved again
Me, to a cis person: “have you….have you had…the surgery?”
Cis person: “what surgery?”
Me: “the one that removes your head from your ass”
Care for an anecdote? I call this one Cis People Are Crazy, and it’s a lil sumthin sumthin that will come as no surprise whatsoever to any trans person.
So, due to All Of The Most Recent Bullshit, I was at a trans support rally in my city yesterday with my family. Some nice person was handing out these big pretty heart stickers with the trans pride flag colors on them, like this:
We all got one. I put mine on the hoodie I was wearing, which I wear a version of basically every day, right? It’s the Cringeandwince uniform.
So, without giving it much thought, I put that hoodie on again today and go food shopping, and – this is dense as fuck, but it took me a few minutes to figure out why so many people were acting weirder than usual towards me.
I got a lot of looks.
I got mainly curiosity from people who noticed at all. But I also received open hostility from two separate White dudes about my age, over-the-top/smile-too-big kindness from a White woman a little older than me, and total, disaggregating confusion from my White 30s male cashier after he asked me what the sticker meant and I told him. As in, my presence coupled with the very concept of trans people seemed to have this guy on the verge of simply falling apart, joint by joint, atomically, behind his register. It was like he blew a fuckin gasket, ok.
For people who don’t know me well enough to know who I am – I’m a straight, mixed Native cis woman in her 40s. While I don’t think I’ve ever been misgendered, I am about 5′10″ and built like a brick shithouse, and I wear mainly “men’s” clothing (black hoodie, blue jeans, hiking boots); the word “butch” has been thrown my way in the past. I also however have very long hair and wear long earrings.
The gamut of reactions today was pretty interesting because I’m a middle-aged woman – I’m almost roundly ignored in public these days, utterly invisible. But the presence of that trans pride sticker changed that on a dime. I left the store thinking to myself, Jesus Christ, this is the most interested people have been about what’s in between my legs since I was about 25.
So, hey, other cis people? Just a suggestion that a lot of us may be looking like total gormless morons – possibly abject fuckwits, maybe even vacuous clowns??? – when we interact with trans people a lot of the time. Try to be aware of this if you ain’t already because: it’s fucking annoying as hell, kinda scary, really really boring, and weird.
Not sure I’ve ever read a more comprehensive summary of How People Stare at Me ™ before now.
i really want to normalise the idea amongst lgbt youth that its okay to switch labels as you further understand your identity. you’re not a traitor or a fake if you realise you’re bi instead of a lesbian, or if you’re a trans woman instead of a gay man. it’s really difficult and scary to be lgbt and it’s doubly hard to deal with a shifting identity amongst all that so… be kind to yourself. you’re learning and figuring yourself out and nothing is set in stone. let yourself figure out what feels most comfortable to you. and for those who are secure in their lgbt identities, particularly adults, don’t make kids feel bad for switching between labels. we’ve all had identity crises in our lives, so provide support and understanding rather than unforgiving attitudes.
this post is not an excuse to jump on the “of course you can’t label yourself at a young age” bandwagon either. young people who stick with and feel comfortable in an identity from an early age are just as valid as you are.
Additionally, on the other side of this – if you know someone who switches labels, it’s also your job to not make them feel like a traitor or a fake. If you’re their friend or you say you support them, then be their friend and support them. If you don’t understand how they could say they were one thing however long ago and now it’s something different, this is your chance to learn, not reject.
And if they later choose to go back to their original label, then they still weren’t faking it. Those were the feelings they had at the time.
Spookielights Tumblr Archive 